THE HINDU

Hi guys,
I recently came across this 'nice' article in 'The Hindu' - our National newspaper! (No matter what 'sleeping' ad 'The Times of India' gives, South India will always buy THE HINDU! You morons!)

BE AN ANNOYING FLIGHT PASSENGER

You've paid for your flight ticket, so you have every right to utilise everything on board to the best of your ability. Too bad most flights these days don't pass around trays filled with candies. Luckily, this is an international flight and they are serving ice-cream, so grab two. And if the air hostess doesn't look amused, tell her: “I paid nearly Rs. 40,000 for the ticket,yaar !” Next up, the pretzels, peanuts and liquor are brought your way. Grab a beer, tune into your favourite entertainment channel, preferably a comedy show, noisily bite into those peanuts and guffaw loudly at what's on your screen. When dinner is served, opt for whatever your co-passenger isn't ordering. And when the food arrives, dig into his tray just to ‘sample' what it tastes like

The flight attendants are at your service, so keep hitting that button to get their attention. “Water,” “Wine,” “Newspaper”, “Warm water this time”... Obviously after all that liquid intake, you need to make frequent trips to the rest room. You've got the window seat and you've also got long legs. So, every time you get up and go, you end up kicking your co-passenger who politely requests you to trade seats with him. Stick your tongue out at him, and say: “I came early just to get the window seat. Better luck next time”

Alright, the cabin lights have been dimmed, and it's time to get some sleep. But, you have to finish watching almost all the in-flight entertainment available. What if you fell asleep, and didn't wake up till the flight was just about to land? So, while people try to nap, you continue munching on the snacks, clapping and laughing. And finally, when people are beginning to rise and shine, you must get some rest. Recline your seat as much as possible. So what if the passenger behind finds it difficult? Now lean back, rest your arms on the armrest even if it means dislodging your co-passenger's from there. Also ask him to turn off his reading light as it interferes with your sleep

Forty five minutes to reach your destination. You see people getting up to head to the rest room. Jump up and dart in with your tooth brush and face wash. Brush your teeth, wash and moisturise your face, comb your hair, change your clothes if you like. Take your time. The others can wait. They will have their turn too, right?

Time to disembark. You don't want to be stuck behind. Be the first one to get up even while the flight is still taxing, yank open the overhead locker, drag your luggage out and rush to the exit door. Then whip out your phone and frantically shout into it: ‘Landed, don't park the car... save on parking charges. I'll be there in half an hour. You keep driving around in circles, ok?”

Well suited for us! :D

Until next time,

Have fun! :) It's DECEMBER!!!

ak